How to do “healthy eating” like a human, not a machine
The start of a new year tends to bring with it a flurry of ambitious goal-setting, especially in the health and wellness department of life. New diets and exercise regimes abound, probably as a knee-jerk reaction to the inevitable extra indulgences that occur over the preceding festive season. It’s understandable, as we can often start the new year feeling uncomfortable and bloated as a result of eating things (and amounts) that we are not used to. But taking steps towards a healthier you, towards feeling (and looking) better all-round can only be a good thing, right? Well…
It all comes down to the mindset behind these lofty new year goals, and behind healthy eating in general. There is absolutely a dark side to the healthy eating coin, and it’s important to acknowledge it, be aware of it, and not fall into its trap. This dark side is one of stress and obsession, cleverly disguised to look like über-impressive self-control and willpower, determination and dedication. All these are of course possible without the dark element of obsession, but it’s important to be aware that it can often sneakily hitch a ride on the backs of these more admirable traits.
You can’t have a healthy body without a healthy mind. How you mentally approach healthy eating matters enormously.
You can’t have a healthy body without a healthy mind. How you mentally approach healthy eating matters enormously. So, given the time of year, here are some ‘guidelines’, intended to help with starting any healthy eating regime you may be considering.
DEFINE YOUR ‘WHY’
This is about being clear on your motivation for eating a certain way. This is important for a couple of reasons: it helps keep you motivated and on track when you are tempted to throw in the towel, but it can also help keep unhealthy thoughts and behaviours at bay by re-centring you and helping guide your choices in the minefield that is healthy eating and dietary protocols.
Why are you choosing to eat like you do? Every person has their own answer to this question. There’s nothing wrong with following a strict plan if it makes you happy and is what your body and health require, but if it has you swimming in anxiety and makes you feel nothing but deprived, then you may need to re-evaluate.
Let your reasons guide your choices. If your goal is better physical health, you cannot jeopardise your mental health to achieve it.
It’s one thing if you have an allergy or severe intolerance and so need to always avoid a certain food, and therefore to be hyper-aware of what you’re eating, and it’s another thing entirely if you have just chosen to follow a specific regime to test-run it. If your ‘why’ is an allergy, then yes, you will need to be more rigid with what you avoid, but if it’s because you want to shed a little extra weight, then eating outside your chosen framework does not carry the same kind of ‘risk’, does it? Especially not if said framework is causing you stress or creating fear of certain foods.
In short: let your reasons guide your choices. If your goal is better physical health, you cannot jeopardise your mental health to achieve it.
BE FLEXIBLE WITH YOUR ‘HOW’ AND ‘WHEN’
Write your own healthy eating rules and don’t set yourself unrealistic goals and timelines as this will only create stress.
It’s one thing to use an established dietary protocol as a starting point and stick to its guidelines to the letter, or to embark on a restrictive regime for a certain limited period of time – such ‘introductory phases’ are often necessary and/or recommended in order to get your body on the right track faster. And that’s fine, but remember, such regimes are not intended for the longer run. When it comes to eating-for-health-for-life, you really need to write your own rules, so that it is sustainable, and doesn’t create stress and anxiety.
Write your own healthy eating rules and don’t set yourself unrealistic goals and timelines as this will only create stress.
You want to follow your own personalised dietary ‘rules’ – because following them makes you feel your best – but not get so stuck in them that they govern your actions and your life, or that, if and when you stray from your established framework, you feel guilty, because you have “broken the rules”.
(For more on this subject, check out this post).
WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE
The way we talk about food is truly fascinating, and very often betrays how we have learned to feel and think about it. Diet culture has been around forever, there’s always some new regime promising miraculous results, accompanied by the relevant impressive before and after photos. Weight loss programmes in particular can be guilty of attaching things like point systems, or words such as “sins” to foods that are to be restricted or avoided altogether.
Certain language around food carries a risk of creating negative associations that can linger far longer than your stint on a particular diet.
The intention here is not to pass judgment on any such systems, but rather to draw attention to the simple fact that certain language around food carries a risk of creating negative associations that can linger far longer than your stint on a particular diet.
Here are some words and phrases to look out for when referring to food or your eating behaviour:
Good/bad
Good/naughty
Sin/sinful
Right/wrong
Allowed/not allowed
Forbidden
We may all throw around such phrasing occasionally, it happens. But if you catch yourself using these regularly, as standard, then try taking a moment to step back and remind yourself that food is not simply good or bad - it is energy and nourishment and one of life’s greatest pleasures.
Don’t shut yourself off to this need for natural adaptation by applying rigid wording and labels to food.
Discovering which foods are best for YOU and which you feel better avoiding, is an organic process that starts and ends with you alone, and is never black and white. Your body changes, its needs change, your tastes change, and so the ‘right’ food for you will also change. Don’t shut yourself off to this need for natural adaptation by applying rigid wording and labels to food.
EXPECT SETBACKS
Welcome to life and the human condition! Setbacks can and will happen, this is a universal truth.
The occasional indulgence or ‘rule-breaking’ is so very natural and should really not be demonised in the way that it so often is. If you are eating the ‘wrong’ things all the time, then yes, the consequences may be worse, and it will most certainly undermine any efforts you are making to see if eating a certain way can help improve your symptoms and/or overall health. But come on, the limited occasional straying from ‘the rules’, on special events or because you have really missed something, is not the equivalent of throwing a spanner into the dietary works.
Setbacks can and will happen, this is a universal truth.
Food is one of life’s great pleasures, and many events revolve around it to a large extent, so to allow yourself to partake in this pleasure, really should not be seen as a bad thing.
If you find yourself “falling off the wagon” and need a little moral support, read this.
BE KIND TO YOURSELF THROUGHOUT
Even when eating something IS the ‘wrong’ thing to do (because it will cause physical symptoms), don’t beat yourself up about it, or feel like you are ‘weak’ for giving in. Don’t punish yourself for having a very human moment. Did you enjoy what you ate? Would you have felt deprived and sad if you had stopped yourself from eating it?
Forgive your human nature.
Give yourself a break, forgive your human nature, take any unwanted consequences (such as digestive discomfort) on the chin, but remember them next time you are faced with making a similar food choice, so you can decide then and there if it’s worth it. And if you decide it is, fine, that’s your choice to make.
WARNING SIGNS
The formation of an unhealthy relationship with food is a gradual process and doesn’t just suddenly happen overnight. Any true healthy eating plan cannot and must not sacrifice peace of mind and overall mental health in the name of strict adherence to that plan.
Any true healthy eating plan cannot and must not sacrifice peace of mind and overall mental health in the name of strict adherence to that plan.
Look out for:
Stress surrounding food and what you can/should eat.
Thinking of, and labelling foods as ‘good’ or ‘bad’.
Anxiety whenever you are not in complete control over the meal you will be eating – eg dinner at a friend’s or at a restaurant.
Feeling guilty if you stray from your chosen dietary regime.
Obsessive thoughts and/or behaviour in relation to food.
Fear of certain foods, or of food and eating in general.
If your healthy eating efforts are creating the above thoughts and feelings, then it is time to call into question just how “healthy” they really are for you.
Please note: there is a psychological condition known as orthorexia (an unhealthy obsession with healthy food and eating), which can cause overall health to suffer. It is important to seek professional help if you feel that you may be experiencing orthorexia.
IN A NUTSHELL…
We seem to live in a world of black and white extremes sometimes, especially when it comes to food and what we choose to eat. The goal is to eat whatever makes you feel your best, and in the way that is best for your body and health (and we are all different in this), without jeopardising the stability of your overall relationship with food. When you are able to achieve that, then you are able to make the best possible decisions about what you do or do not choose to put into your body, thus improving your health without sacrificing your peace of mind.